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Warning: lack of sobriety. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
♻️ 1 Retweets
❤️ 10 Favorites
Mood -5 🙁
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Hanging out with my best friend’s ex. Not the best decision I’ve made all week. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
♻️ 1 Retweets
❤️ 5 Favorites
Mood +6 🙂
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I’m the most adult person here. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
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Things to know: what is a ferkin #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
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On a dock with lots of other inebriated young people. AMA #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
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🍩 for President #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood +1 🙂
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Shots? #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 4 Favorites
Mood 0
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The iPhone 7 is great at club photography. Not my usual venue but…#mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood +3 🙂
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Now having a ridiculously expensive drink at someone else’s expense. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
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It sucks to be the adult of the group. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood -3 🙁
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Oh my god drink people are worse than anything else to try and corral. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood -2 🙁
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I wore my watch in the club. Nobody noticed. This is a good thing. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +3 🙂
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Nobody did. #muteme SamTheGeek/779902948960768000Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
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Someone erased my sudo. This has been recorded in the log files. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
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I’ve kept the Uber waiting for 15 minutes. I’m that guy. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
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Never going to the club again. This has gone, um, ‘not well.’ #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
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This has been ‘Poor decision making’ with SamTheGeek #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
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Confirmed: I should stick to my usual. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
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The last time the Cubs won the World Series, the Ottoman Empire existed. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood +3 🙂
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Christopher_A Probably. We shall see. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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I’m discussing video games and yelling “fuck the patriarchy” #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
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“Drunk Sam is just Sam but more.” #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
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Only the trashiest bars are appropriate for me. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +2 🙂
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I think I treated someone wrong tonight. How do I make it up to them? #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood -2 🙁
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@raynell_cooper in the context it actually doesn’t matter. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood +1 🙂
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Oof. Good morning. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood +3 🙂
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Knocked my phone out of my hand and then caught it in midair 👌🏼 #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
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These are my people. I miss them. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood -2 🙁
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.joesteel why are you liking all of my drunk tweets? #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood 0
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Sometimes your friends share stories that will probably become apocryphal legend with you. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood +1 🙂
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Had a very serious debate tonight over the appropriateness of puffy vests given the current climate. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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I danced tonight. I will never speak of this again. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood 0
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joesteel Enough that it’s apparent you’ve read the entire thread. Are they so entertaining? #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +2 🙂
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neomillennial I can reassure you that it takes more than that. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood +1 🙂
-
*waves at film_girl from the Uber* #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
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Drunk me is very happy that I prepositioned water next to my bed. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood +1 🙂
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neomillennial good that someone reminded you to. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood +3 🙂
-
Who let mb near a suit. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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mb This has made a lot of people very angry and is widely regarded as a bad move. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood -6 🙁
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Nice. #muteme davedittell/796123632565108736Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +3 🙂
-
nice. #muteme crystallized/796182544765030400Permalink On twitter.com
Mood +3 🙂
-
And the discussion has turned to dinosaur 🍆 #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood +2 🙂
-
Signs your apartment might look like Pinterest #muteme mb/796169176629080064Permalink On twitter.com
Mood +2 🙂
-
My hair is falling out. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood -1 🙁
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It took him ten seconds to realize I was referring to him when I mentioned this. #muteme mb/796186880035405824Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
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I’m about to book this one-way flight. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 4 Favorites
Mood 0
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Are there still people in line in North Carolina? #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
♻️ 1 Retweets
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
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People think that flying swastikas is ok. That I do not deserve to exist. That is sobering. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
♻️ 1 Retweets
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +1 🙂
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Yes, that’s what a swastika represents. It represents marching me to the gas. It represents machine gunning children. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
♻️ 1 Retweets
Mood +1 🙂
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It doesn’t represent a better time. It represents what we fought against in that time you idolize as better. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood +4 🙂
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The mood in this bar is sober. People are planning their exit strategies. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood 0
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I have enough miles for a one way ticket to TLV #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
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The KKK thinks I don’t deserve to live in this country. #muteme kimye___/796200566594609153Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
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Now we know who we really are. Tomorrow we wake up and get to work to change that. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
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I’m not leaving. I’m staying. Let’s prove we’re better than this. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood +2 🙂
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Let’s be honest: the KKK endorsement doesn’t matter. The lack of repudiation matters. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +4 🙂
-
For the record: dismantling the ACA will be more expensive than leaving it in place. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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“The work goes on, the cause endures, the hope still lives, and the dream shall never die“ #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +3 🙂
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Tonight’s topic: #flannelswag #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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I guess I’m playing bar trivia #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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Hi. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
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Fuck I forgot #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood -5 🙁
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"The United States should not admit it's own president" #muteme LambdaLegal/825153267688697856Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood +2 🙂
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I'm going to look at my 2018 tax returns and cry because I know the cost of those 💵 #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood +1 🙂
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"Once we were strangers too" is a great biblical reference that too many will miss. #muteme ADL_National/825073886702211072Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood +1 🙂
-
Nice. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood +3 🙂
-
Apparently, Schwarzenegger is not the hero we deserve, but he’s the hero we need. #muteme ABC/827169937139576832Permalink On twitter.com
Mood +4 🙂
-
Three M trains in 5 minutes, but no B, D, or F trains. Really‽ #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood -1 🙁
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Make that five M trains, an F, a D, and an A — which doesn’t even stop at this station — but no B. In twenty minutes. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood -2 🙁
-
My cousin is on the ice! He’s a firefighter keeping the ice runways safe. YES, they have firefighters in Antarctica. #muteme AusAntarctic/827296678575104001Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +2 🙂
-
Mind. Blown. #muteme justinjm1/827911187362934793Permalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
-
When the bar is so chill the bartender walks outside for a smoke. 👌 #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +2 🙂
-
“It’s cold as balls, that’s why I’m dressed like a teddy bear! Or a pimp.” #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +2 🙂
-
The line for the bathroom is insane. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood -2 🙁
-
It me. #muteme drance/828078034351583233Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
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Listening to New Order while playing Street Fighter and drinking a PBR. I’m either a hipster or in 1987. Not sure which. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood 0
-
Now in the bar: soundhound.com/?t=100383724566083402 I like this place. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood +2 🙂
-
When zkahn surprises you in the bar 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻 #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
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The last bar was ‘80s throwback. Now we’re in the ‘90s. (Sup zkahn) #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
-
Permalink
On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood -1 🙁
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Pizzzaaaaaaaaaaaaa 🍕 #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood +2 🙂
-
Had a tic tac as I left the bar and my breath is so fresh #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood +1 🙂
-
This is the most @lenny__belardo tweet I have ever tweeted. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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This is my only #muteme of the night.Permalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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Disco in the 21st century. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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I’m at the party and I’m definitely the least cool person here. Still feel p cool. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood +2 🙂
-
I’m sitting in the corner of the party contemplating faking my own death. /cc RebeccaSlatkin CriminalShow #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood -5 🙁
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It me. I’m here. #muteme lenny__belardo/835690776311001088Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
-
I am now the adult in the room. Um. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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Today was tough. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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I'm going to bed. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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I made this comment like 10 hours before someone called in a bomb threat to that school. #muteme SamTheGeek/836065852642496513Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood -1 🙁
-
Help. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood +2 🙂
-
For the record I’m fine but at a karaoke bar and I cannot sing in any key. Much less on key. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood +2 🙂
-
The B train is very late and I am salty. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
-
🤔 #muteme CNBC/845360219211345920Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
-
That’s soho. I guess I missed him today. #muteme RED/845333722366951425Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood -2 🙁
-
Whoops. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
-
Terrible bars are terrible. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood -6 🙁
-
I’m too drunk for 8:30 #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood -2 🙁
-
I’m at the caseyliss pizza place and he might just hate me. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood -3 🙁
-
John’s. It’s the drunk pizza. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood -2 🙁
-
That’s three. I might be bad at adulting. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood -3 🙁
-
Four in a row! #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
-
This tweet brought to you by poor decision making, my bank account, and the number fifteen #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood -2 🙁
-
Hi #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
-
This has gone… well? #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
-
Um. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
-
Spent a lot of time with good people tonight. This is what I want to do forever. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood +4 🙂
-
Work people are 💯 #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
-
This thread is me. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
-
I’m drinkless in a bar. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
-
This is just bad business. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood -3 🙁
-
Apparently jamiepinkham likes trolling me when I’m drunk. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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.jamiepinkham How sure are you #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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.jamiepinkham 0% #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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How does a bar run out of wings on wing night‽ #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
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This hotel has the dopest of shower drains. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
-
"We forgot" #muteme cameronesposito/868590649754267648Permalink On twitter.com
Mood -1 🙁
-
At WWDC but this qualifies for #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
-
So Christopher_A is very drunk. I am… only slightly less so #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood -2 🙁
-
What is Craig showing the size of, gruber? #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
♻️ 1 Retweets
Mood 0
-
Someone left the lights on in the office. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
-
Tonight should have been a fun evening in the park. But somehow, it became a metaphor for why art is important. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood +6 🙂
-
“Arrival Scan: New York, NY, United States 12:24 AM” #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood +1 🙂
-
Thing that I forgot that I do when drunk: sneeze continuously. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood -5 🙁
-
So uh. Karaoke on a Wednesday. I guess these people are my people. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
-
Should I have another Peach Tea Bourbon? 1) Yes 2) Yes 3) Two #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +2 🙂
-
I’ve already ranted about Cam Newton, the ACA, and plan B tonight. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
-
Just ordered a burrito bowl from the good taqueria. Thankfully they’re open ‘til 3am. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood +3 🙂
-
Wrong. The correct answer was: 3 #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood -2 🙁
-
Duh. But the patriarchy means that’s want to control the supply for.. reasons? #muteme bessbell/916329932502065152Permalink On twitter.com
Mood +1 🙂
-
Hey Ya just came on in the Lyft and our driver turned the volume up. He gets 5 stars. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
-
Lit went off on a guy for not stocking Plan B at home last night because tbh it’s an inexpensive way to show you respect women. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +2 🙂
-
Finally. #muteme jamiepinkham/931359712481771521Permalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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Oh no. /cc gabeschindler #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood -1 🙁
-
Oh. It’s one of these again. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
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I fully support this as a metric for your partner. #muteme kateleth/931999744410337280Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +2 🙂
-
They do. It’s obvious. #muteme greenhousenyt/932087304931414016Permalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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Brunch! #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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Old enough to remember when Nazi sympathizers didn’t get flattering portraits in national newspapers. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 2 Favorites
Mood 0
-
It’s that kind of night again! #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +2 🙂
-
Jathiest™ #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
-
A truth for the ages. #muteme imyke/934578481685463041Permalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood 0
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There's a clawfoot tub and I can't even. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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I've been to Uniqlo, a party, sands now karaoke #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
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This bar has good taste in recycling bins. #thereturnofmuteme #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +3 🙂
-
Cheese plates! #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
-
I am currently wearing two layers of tee shirt. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
-
No, I just had to put the hackathon tee over my regular one. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood -1 🙁
-
I’m gonna tweet from Japan for one reason: #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
-
OH: “I love that play-doh became the theme of this party.” #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +3 🙂
-
Whoops forgot to hashtag #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood -1 🙁
-
I once watched DBtodomundo bicycling down Bowery wearing a white suit. #muteme johnmoe/990013756381032448Permalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
-
It’s Britney time. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood 0
-
Ok we moved on to Mulan. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
-
Ugh. Hate to see this. 😜 #muteme mertdumenci/992957401765560320Permalink On twitter.com
Mood -3 🙁
-
In all seriousness, mertdumenci is awesome and we’re going to seriously miss him this summer. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +2 🙂
-
Tonight the fog is reallllllll #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
-
I am so bad at dancing #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood -3 🙁
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Someone is now opera singing in my building. It is 11:32pm on a Wednesday. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
-
So parrots is right #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
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A physicist tries to drunkenly explain time. #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0
-
I guess by “unify iOS and macOS underpinnings” they meant “run a bunch of iOS on a subsystem in your Mac.” #muteme _inside/1017417172077801479Permalink On twitter.com
Mood 0
-
Drunk tacos are the best tacos. Even more so when with people who feel like family #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 3 Favorites
Mood +3 🙂
-
I'm flying to France tomorrow but tonight I'm celebrating people important to me #mutemePermalink On twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood +5 🙂
-
Tfw you feel the subway run right past the underground bar #mutemeOn twitter.com
❤️ 1 Favorite
Mood 0